Tag Archives: confidence

Acquiring more Willpower to reach those goals

I know this sounds hideous,
but, you are reading a self proclaimed wizards blog.

Don’t you?

haha,

But, enough with the jokes. 😉

Willpower defines your strength to achieve goals.

The more you want something, the more confident you are in taking or reaching it.

When did you ever achieve something without wanting to achieve?
Or the other way around, did you too want to achieve something so bad, but still couldn’t?

You can, of course you have to keep being ambitious,
but sometimes one can acquire more willpower by just resting.

While resting, you also have to keep rethinking and reframing what you want, how you want to achieve it and why you want it.
If you keep on  reflecting, your Confidence will be higher, and so your Willpower will be stronger.

“Study hard”, “Work hard” and etc. are just not purposeful if you keep working hard without resting.

Yours,

Wlad C.

Alpha Females

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One does not argue with anyone who is far more dominant than oneself,
but dominance does not only mean physical dominance.

Dominance works with request and confirmation: 
The sender and the receiver of subconscious signals (body-posture, body-language, etc.).

If one receives dominating signals from the sender and CONFIRM them, even by reacting to them, the receiver sent a confirmation and the sender becomes dominant. You tell them that they have more value than you and that you understand and accept that.
With males, the one who wins any stare down, is the one who is the most dominant. (Presumably, there are variations)
With females, it is a little different:

See, dominant men, are alpha males, of some sort.
Alpha males are far more attractive to girls than beta males, they give her safety, ALLOW her subconsciously to mate with someone (in this case him) and are worthy of mating in a particular group, while beta males don’t, usually, until they are chosen by other alpha males to be allowed to mate, which makes them sort of Alpha, but this is a certainly other topic…
So, you see, dominant or Alpha men (as in human) are ought to mate.
That’s called preselection.
So, with girls, preselection is pretty much the same as with guys, though the girl you chose to flirt with always has the same level of value as you give to yourself and as you value her. Otherwise men feel very incongruent and unsure.
The alpha girl, is usually the most confident girl, who is, in her group, the most social and probably the most popular. She does not value you on the amount of friends you have, as her friends circle 
is far too big to join your group of friends anyway.
gave her so much experience, that she will make up your leaking in social integrity.
But we are not talking about how to pick up an alpha female.
Like males, females have their own hierarchy, which is very much based on their looks and outer confidence.
A lower female is supposed to leave mates to the alpha girl first.
But it’s not as strict as with males.
The male chooses his female, therefor females get jealous and more willing.
Other than with males, females do often tolerate men having more than one mate.
In our society, it is not attractive nor value increasing if a female has more than one mate.

Cheers, Wlad C.

Do not listen to your teachers!

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Here I am talking about school teachers, but it also applies to every kind of teacher.

Everyone has gone through their own path in life, especially teachers are quite narrow here.

Most teachers have gone through only one form of education: how to educate in school.


Thats all.
No more than that.
Of course, you can learn from anybody and I am known to think so,
but there is a little something that I am well concerned about and it should definitely concern you aswell.
Teachers can only give small advices, they cannot predict your future nor do they know any form of psychology to be able to tell how you will evolve.
Only you can tell.
AND those who control you.
But to tell you the truth, you first should handle this problem.
Teachers are control freaks.
Did you notice, that some, no matter how smart they are, students are getting bad marks? 
No matter how hard they try?
Teachers don’t notice it, they might not even know about that,
but their instinct of domination is becoming their obsession,
they become depressed, without even knowing it.
It is their depression, their problem. And you are the one who has to deal with it.
Unfair?
NO!

Teachers… teach. Even though they don’t even know what they are teaching most of the time.

They are NOT teaching you how to get better in life or how to handle your future job better.

No,
all you actually learn are two things:

You learn how to become a teacher yourself
and the very important thing:

You learn how to deal with psychopaths.
It is nearly impossible to get top rank marks in school if you do not know how to treat psychopaths and how to deal with their influence.

This is why top students are so important.

They find the teacher’s vulnerabilities and use those without the teacher realizing nor putting any pressure on them.

All they do is comforting the teacher, while also giving them the feeling of being understood.

To finish this of,
do not listen to your teachers, but learn from them.

Cheers, Wlad C.

Why we go to school

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Some look back to it, some hate it and some, like me, try to make the best of it.

The principe is simple:


“Only the smartest of them all can survive till the very end!”

But, what do I mean?

You go to school, to get your high school degree to be qualified for university, preferably, right?

But in the meantime, what do you learn?

Yeah, yeah, you learn something for the future… but I do not think it is the lessons, that are valuable.

See, we all go to school for about 12-13 years (depends on which country),
we learn, repeat, learn repeat, then we proof to our teacher, that we actually do know how to use information.

But this is not valuable, no it’s not.

What is most valuable, is the experience of being in a society.
You don’t quite understand how it works, till you finish school.

The world outside there… It is just like in school, just bigger.

So, in school you actually have an artificial, compact model of the society out there:

  1. The Hierarchy

    There are always, the cool guys, the hot girls, the followers and the losers.

  2. Leadership

    The coolest kids, always command someone else. They dominate their followers and the followers are therefore taking part of a group.

  3. Interest groups

    Everyone has their own hobbies, which prepare them for life. Better or worse…

  4. Economic value (poor vs. rich)

    There will always be this cool kid, always having the newest nike’s or whatever.

  5. Seduction

    First sex, getting laid a lot etc.

  6. Education etc.
So, you get the idea.
The ‘real’ world is no different. It is just more detailed and advanced.

The trick is to master all or as much of possible of this.

Cheers, Wlad C.

Did your partner fall in love with you?

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Recently I wrote an article on how to cure Oneitis.
It’s “symptoms” are though only felt by the person experiencing it.

There is nothing wrong with knowing those signs yourself, as it is normal to give them away.

Once fell in love, you figure yourself thinking about this person all the time,
you cannot think straight if they didn’t text you for a few hours or did not respond at all today.

Even if you were busy all day long and just could not reach this person, they will become nervous when they text you.

You can say that about 95% of People even talk in monologues when texting their crush.

Imagine, this was a chat window:

Partner1: “Hey, how are you?”

Partner1: “I’ve been doing ….”

Partner1: “haha”

Partner1: “How was your day?”

Partner1: “Sorry, I write so much haha”

Of course, they also may just like you, or need some attention at the time.
This indicator itself does not  approve anything but sympathy yet.

A quick check you can do on yourself (if you are having an Oneitis) is:

  1. Do you feel like you are having a rush when the partner touches you?
  2. Do you miss the partner immediately after saying goodbye after a meeting.
  3. Do you feel a lot of tension when you’re alone with them and thinking “I can’t quite express myself right to them. If they only knew…”etc. ?

So, you get the idea. Before being able to read other people, you have to understand, how you feel yourself being in the same situation. Imagine their experience instead of just observing.

The more experience you get, the easier understanding them is.

So, to the 1. point above: Whenever you feel in love with someone, you try to touch them, no matter what. You can observe them doing the same. If they touch you every time they have the chance to do so, they are either gaming you or trying to get a hold on you by actually touching you.

2. point: Missing the partner immediately after parting shows a lot of insecurity, as they feel like you will forget them immediately after leaving, they will try to contact you either in the exact same minute you leave and text you, OR they won’t contact you for 3 days (try to maintain the 3 day rule) if you just started dating.

3. point: The shock when you are suddenly alone with this person.
When you are having a shock, what is the very first thing you do?
You react.

How do you react? 

Facial expression!

How does shocked look like?

  • Staring or opening eyelids as far as possible and more than normal. The “Bamby-Eyes” if you want to name it.

So, now that you found out that your partner fell or did not fall in love with you.
What do you do?

Do you feel the same?

In case they do not show those signs, maybe they are not ready yet?
Maybe you just found this article while searching for approval that they actually might like you despite of all those negative reactions you get?

Leave them some space then.

But, if you do get the desired reactions, congratulations! Have fun with your newly assured partner!

This all is to be taken with a massive grain of salt of course.

Do talk about that you noticed something different in their behaviour, but do not tell them “But this blog said you were in love with me!”

This article is there to help you, but it is by far not a guide to follow one by one.

Cheers, Wlad C.

How to deal with Depression

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There are two main types of depression, most depressions are ‘software’ related, only some of them are ‘hardware’ related.


If you believe to have a depression, then here are a few questions you can ask yourself:

  • Are you ready to take very high risks (for example driving way too fast or tend to neglet important meetings and friends) ?
  • Do you smoke cigarettes/weed (yes I know your secrets haha) or drink alcohol more than usual?
    • do you feel like you have a certain relieve after consuming it?
  • Are you very unhappy with yourself or your life?
  • Do you lack interest in your hobbies or things you found interesting before?
  • Are you afraid of failure? Especially when you do everyday stuff?
  • Do you even feel like taking your own life?
  • Do you lose control over your emotions regularly?
  • Do you feel the urge to prove yourself to others or to constantly dominate?
  • Do you argue with friends and family a lot?
  • Do you feel like you have to do a lot of sports to feel better?
In the mental state of a depression, it is clearly normal to have less energy and to not feel like doing anything.
Don’t blame yourself here, you are responsible for yourself, BUT one cannot just stop being depressed, so bare with your own.
The best thing you can do, when you are depressed, is to take action.

The most important thing here is to take small steps though.

Even if you’re a tough guy, taking too big steps may wreck your ability to regain happienes and motivation and may set you back by months!


Cheers, Wlad C.

Check your Congruence to fix your Confidence

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Sometimes we just “act” confident but project very insecure sings.
Here are a few tips on how to quickly check your alignment of thoughts and actions:

  1. Check your Body language:
    1. Are you standing upright with a straight spine?Fix your posture.
    2. Does your face direct below horizontal or above? Above is good, below is a submissive sign of being unconfident or not feeling that you deserve doing what you’re doing.
      Look up for a few minutes. This might come of a little arrogant, but it’s ok to look like an Asshole for a little while.
    3. Do you unconsciously try to avoid keeping eye-contact?
      Even the slightest escape is submissive action.
      Don’t look directly into the eyes, you can look at their forehead, nose or even their eyebrows or chin. They won’t notice the difference.
  2. Communication
    1. Do you get interrupted quickly by the person you’re speaking to?
      Focus on what the current situation looks like: Are you taking up as much space as always?
      Does the one who interrupts you have his/her head up and keeps eye-contact longer than you?
    2. People are giving you a weird face when you’re talking to them?
      Fringe your eyes and give them a clear sign, that you understood that they are trying to dominate you right now. Just don’t let them do that and accept, that they don’t want a friendship with you and are only focusing on what they can get out of you.
  3. What are your current thoughts and aims?
    1. Are you merely trying to get a reaction out of someone?
      You don’t need a reaction.
      Assume, that the person you are confronting, is thinking positively about you all the time. Don’t try to force them to do so.
    2. Do you think you have to make everyone else like you?
      That means that you accepted being the beta-male.
      This is alarming if this is not what you are and want to be.
    3. You just want to take care of others?
      You are trying to keep the focus or attention off you and focusing on another person.
      This is showing that you have something to hide. Just don’t.
Cheers, Wlad C.

Shape shifting

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This is also on Lifting your self valuation.
Shape shifting your mind and appearance to other people is quiet tricky.
You are switching between personalities, So be careful.
If you screw it up, you may become less sympathetic to the particular person.

There is a System out there about the 8 Types of people, or women to be exact.
I for myself do not think this System was very useful. Yes there are different types of people,
but how on earth would you know what you are confronting, if these people are most often a mix of different character types.
You do not want to meet anyone who is boring.

Social Calibration


So, here comes the tricky part: to do Shape shifting in a social environment or around different people, you have to be socially calibrated.
That means you have to go out and talk to a lot of people first, before you can switch between different personality types.
Still, at First, even if you are a complete starter, you can try out one personality for each friends circle.
You may struggle at first, especially when meeting a friend from one circle and then another from another circle you have.
They do both, of course, not know the difference.
You may appear creepy when you meet both at the same time.
Here you might have to make people qualify.
You are the leader anyway.
If some person is getting suspicious, you may use some tricks like valuing one friend over another.
Through this, the less valued friend will respect you more, but will not call you to meet anymore, the more valued one will call you more, still you could even screw his/her self image up, making them arrogant.
Here I advise you not to confront two different circles with each other if you are not ready yet.


Example for Shape shifting:

You may use the higher phase (if in control) to meet high energy people to fit in first.
Later you can get to them with a lower phase for them to push you up and destroy your low phase.
If you cannot get UP and have a strong down phase, these friends are the best for you to contact if you need help.
If you are in a casual down phase, you will either need friends who have low energy and some hobbies.
Doing hobbies while in high phase may also boost your skills though.

Optimism, the right one.

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That’s not going to be easy.
It’s not as easy as you think.
It will be hard.

Bullshit!
These arguments never stopped me. And they will not stop you from achieving your goals, ever!

Let’s analyse it:
People who tell that, are very pessimistic, right.
But they also do not believe in you. Their perspective does not involve your abilities, your possibilities in near future and all of your mindset.

I for myself am sometimes over optimistic.
Of course, you have to calibrate, whether you are too optimistic or not optimistic enough.


Realism

…is complete bullshit regarding people comparing themselves.
As most of the so called “realism” comes from people no one, or most of those who use the word realism, really understands in the first place.
Best to say, is what I created as a photo for facebook recently.
You may not find this being my profile picture anymore,
as I do part my private profile from my “official” artist pages.

Establishing the base confidence

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As you may or may not know, confidence is more of a skill rather than something you are born with.
Of course you can be raised up to be confident, but everyone has his particular “holes” in their personality.

NOBODY IS PERFECT

Or at least, that’s what they say and what we keep repeating as is sounds logical to us.
In the context of noone being able to know what to do next and how to obtain a higher level of confidence it does have reason.

But first, let me explain, why confidence is so important.
The best way is to take an example out of our everyday life.
We all have a certain hobby, sport or whatever you do what I will not try to guess, we’d like to be good at.
But what defines confidence? And why does it affect our learning and training?

We all had those friends, telling us that we cannot do something.
We cannot sing or we are just not that type of what it takes to be to do something.
Actually, you’re not born with that confidence to throw these harassing words off.

Confidence is trained.

Body language

As people ask me, how to be confident, I will most certainly look at them and tell them to straighten their spine.

Not a big thing, huh?
It’s not. But it’s effect is huge!

Try this:
Stand up straight.
As straight as you can.
Now throw your neck back.
Also, you can try to lift your arms sidewards to take up more space.

This will ensure, that you take up as much space as possible.

Why this is important?

We all express ourselves through body language.