Recently, I managed to get myself into a great low (being very depressed and low on energy)
Instead of venting off to someone in my contact list, I decided to give my friends a break and vent off in this text:
(this text is merely focused on the emotions, not the information or opinions given)
“An hour ago, I went to Vodafone (Germany), actually willing to look at the new Nexus 6, whilst not even finding it.
After asking how much a single contract with another, similar phone actually costs, a vendor tries to get me into signing a contract immediately. He is very persistent, trying to force the contract onto me.
Whilst saying no, he still persists?!?
at least that’s not how I imagine it.
I decided to take a look at the LG G4 and the Note 4, which I didn’t really consider being worth the costs.
I do have my own reasons, which may not apply to you.
So I’ll have to leave the reasons out.
I went straight to apple, took a look at the iPhone 6 plus.
I like it, but I am not sure about signing a contract for a phone that might get replaced by a new model yearly, so that I find myself having an outdated model very quickly and the price itself isn’t really attractive.
Screw it, I went out to a lake and sat down on a bench next to a, maybe, beautiful blonde girl.
I didn’t really look at her face yet. Being too busy with being inside my head and figuring out what’s going on with me today.
…I took a glimpse.
Nope, my hope was proven wrong, not my type. AT ALL! (haha)
I think I feel better now, after renting off here… and after the short, evil and quiet laugh that slipped my throat.
I should really rent about renting now, as this is what the title says.
Ah, renting is… somehow a relief of negative energy, while I still feel helpless afterwards. It relieves one sort of bad feeling and replaces it with another.
“Man up, idiot!”
is what I tell myself in such situations.
Some stress here, no sleep there. And I ended up being very self conscious in every situation I wasn’t before.
Maybe this is a lesson.
I should be more positive.
Maybe that’s why so many people seem to be turned off by me. (Self criticism, not actual fact)
I need more positivity, not trying to act like an ‘Alpha Male’ and not seeking validation seems to do the trick better than doing so.
this is not natural, I should be what girls always tell us: be myself…
my best self…
Beauty isn’t what it seems to be, or at least, it doesn’t make you feel so. AT ALL!
Taking a look around here, I figured, I do feel good
or at least compared to everyone else here, it looks like I am the happiest.
This is in fact very sad!
Everyone is far more lonely than me…
If only everyone could be at least as positive as I am.
Or at least as positive as I can make myself feel when I think positively for at least five minutes… If they only knew…
I shall try to write more about my current feelings…
No, no one cares about that.
But thinking positive…
What is so repelling about it?
Maybe renting is just far more comfortable than ‘making yourself happy’
It feels more real, though being less practical than drinking hot tea in a hot summer day.
At least it tastes good…”
This text was on my desktop for quite a while.
Of course i did manage to rise myself up again, it’s easy to escape each low if you know how.
But, see the point: We always have to rent about so irrelevant things at times.
Not pathetic, rather normal.
Everyone can relate, so no need to feel embarrassed…
But try to keep it down, seriously.
Cheers, Wlad C.